THE LITTLE THINGS

If I’m learning anything about “adulting”, it’s that life isn’t so much about the quantity of our achievements but the quality of them. I’ve experienced what might look like “having it all” – from having a very high salary at the age of 19 and having zero debt, to taking big trips every year, to eventually owning a home at 23 years old, to having a big wedding at 24. I like to believe that what got me there was consistency in being “faithful in the little things” and sort of “moving up” from there, but I’m realizing that “having it all” isn’t measured by material things in God’s eyes. God certainly wants us to have it all – He wants to be our all and more. He’s after our heart – having our whole heart – and He wants us to be after His, wholeheartedly, too. 

I know this because from age 26-27 life took a huge turn and I found myself needing Jesus more than ever. At age 28 now, I’m making a lot less salary, I’m no longer a homeowner, I’m recovering from deep debt, and I haven’t stepped foot out of North America in a few years, yet God is still after the one thing he’s been after my whole life – my heart. At the end of the day, He cares much more about how well I’m stewarding my responsibilities than how much I’m stewarding. 

Luke 16:10 says, “If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones. But if you are dishonest in little things, you won't be honest with greater responsibilities.” And Matthew 25:23 says, “His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things.”

I think somewhere along the way I stopped being faithful in the little things, like praying, seeking God’s wisdom, and tithing. That’s when life got really crazy. Many of my decisions weren’t the best ones, so it’s not hard to see why things crumbled. But I feel like God found it necessary to remove some things from my life so that He could re-position me to His heart. He couldn’t put me in charge of anything more when I was struggling to be in charge of the small, and boy did I start to learn real humility!

Now, when I look at my life it’s tempting to think I don’t have as much as I did before, but I actually have MUCH more. I look at my amazing husband, my charismatic daughter, my growing baby bump, and I wonder how having a family is a “little” thing, ha! Deep down I’m dreaming of much, but I know in this season God’s asking me to be a good steward of what matters most – my character, marriage, my little people, and my sphere of influence. So until God says I’m ready for more (whatever that looks like), I’ll be responsible with what I’ve been entrusted with, and continue to seek His heart in the meantime.

MARIEL HONG

MARIEL HONG

 

Qualified

I was broken but I am not broke. 

I am stronger then I have ever been before.  

One of the biggest lessons I have learnt the last several years is although my life and spirit were once broken, that does not and never did disqualify me.  

I felt that my failures had disqualified me from having a voice or opinion that was to be valued and respected.  I have had many people look up to me for leadership and on how to live a strong, God centred life. To be a wife that was to be honoured and revered, a mother who raised perfect, God fearing children. I stood on stages as an example but what example was I when my 'perfect' life was crumbling beneath me. 

I had taken myself out of the running because I didn’t think I had a voice. I believed I couldn't speak wisdom because I had failed.  I didn’t think my opinion was wanted or valued because look where it had brought me so far… to brokenness. So, I conceded my run, and I chose to be happy being the diminished person I believed I was. I was determined to put my strength and effort into becoming whole again – mind, body and spirit, and to being a consistent and loving mom.  I figured there were others around me who were far more qualified to be heard, and their wisdom and track records were superior to my own.

I’m not really sure what moment I noticed I actually might have something of value to add to the conversation.  It might have been when someone unknowingly made a blanket statement about marriage and I thought, wait, that’s not everyone’s story.  It could have been when people were talking about a family unit as a whole and the thought, again, that’s not my story. It could have been when a newly single mom, whose world had just come crashing down came to me crying, broken and not sure what to do. I could offer wisdom and insight into her situation because I was just a few steps ahead of where she was right then.

I have value.  I have wisdom.  More wisdom, in fact, then I had before. I understood the story from a different perspective. A perspective that is only earned after you’ve personally walked down that road.  I understood that no story or life is perfect.  We all walk our own roads and have our own challenges, and we can’t judge another’s decisions because we simply really don’t know their circumstance.

I very recently met a new friend who told me about a Japanese art called Kintsukuroi. This is where they repair and mend broken pottery by filling in the cracks with gold or silver.  They do this with the understanding that the piece, having suffered damage, now had a history that made it more beautiful and valuable. (See picture below)
 



What a brilliant picture this is.  Our brokenness doesn’t decrease our value.  Once fixed and mended, with hard work and diligence it becomes stronger and more valuable then before. 

It has been hard work to refuse to shrink back and hide my past and my struggles. I will wear my past brokenness proudly, and use the experience to help serve a hurting and dying world, desperate for wisdom on how to navigate what we label as failures, and who want to know there is hope. They need to hear from someone who knows where they are on the journey and can testify that life will be ok, that they will be ok, that they will be better then ok.  

The future looks bright!

ASHLEY MOHRCreative Pastor

ASHLEY MOHR

Creative Pastor

 

USE YOUR WORDS

We gathered at the beginning of May for our Sisterhood Conference here at Relate Church, and I’m still enjoying the afterglow that comes from a really encouraging, challenging and empowering conversation. There were a few themes that ran through the words that were spoken, and one was the power of our voices as women. In our homes, workplaces, churches and from whatever platform we may have, our engaged voices aren’t only needed but totally imperative. To be clear – the world isn’t necessarily in need of more opinions. There are just so many of those and they’re noisy. There is, however, a need for hard-won wisdom and engaged vulnerability and the power of a life poured out and shared with others. We can all encourage someone. We all have much to give. Someone is behind you on the path, in need of your voice calling them forward.

As we wrapped up our afternoon session on Saturday, our team passed out a gift to each woman – a lovely glass lantern. It went home with everyone as a reminder that we are all here to be light. I had written a commissioning prayer for this moment and read it over those gathered as they prepared to leave. Many of the words are pulled straight out of scripture, a light for our path. I’ll share it with you, and hope that you’ll receive this as my prayer over your life as well. (Yes, you!) You may or may not hear encouragement regularly or ever… You may feel hidden, ignored or powerless. Perhaps you’re tired or overwhelmed or making plans to quit. Maybe you’re just unsure about your path forward. I’m praying that you carry on, and that you speak up. Your voice and your light is essential, and none of us walk alone. 

Commissioning Prayer

I pray that you would hear and know his voice, and that you'd listen. You’ll lean in and make time and willingly sacrifice to get facetime with our Creator and Caller. I pray that the God-whisper would drown out any doubt or fear, distraction or diversion. I pray that you would long for His direction and His peace above all else. I pray that His light would be your flame, His word a lamp to your feet and a light to your path. 

I pray that you would be deeply rooted. That you'd sink your heart and energy into the long-term, perennial, eternal purpose that is your calling and future. You will stand firm like a flourishing tree planted by God’s design, deeply rooted by the brooks of bliss; bearing fruit in every season of your life. Never dry, never fainting, ever blessed, ever prosperous. May you know how wide and deep and good his love is for you, and make yourself at home in it. 

I pray that you'd not despise small beginnings or the inevitable ordinary. That you would find joy in little victories, and welcome the adventure of daily surrender. Let your everyday and ordinary life be an offering, a life poured out through sacrifices both small and extravagant. May you know rest and resist striving. I pray that you'd see his glory in the routine of your life and may love be your everyday garment, your motivation and your reward. 

I pray that you'd have the courage to continue. I pray that you'll be known for your faithfulness, steady and true. You will stay the course, dust yourself off easily and get back up again when you fail. May your character only grow. May hope anchor your soul. I pray that you wrap yourself in His strength, and carry yourself with confidence. 

I pray that you'd go together. May you know and be the church of God's glorious design, encouraging and calling out the gifts in one another. I pray that you would assume the best in each other, challenge and comfort one another and live out Sisterhood as you go.  

You are called and commissioned as salt and light, bringing flavour and colour, clarity and hope to your world. You're peacemakers, influencers all, women marked by grace, pushing back darkness and confronting evil with the light of Jesus. 

God bless you and keep you,

God smile on you and gift you,

God look you full in the face and make you prosper. 

ANGELA DOELLExecutive Pastor

ANGELA DOELL

Executive Pastor

DROWNING

"I feel like I'm drowning."

I can't even tell you how many times I have heard this phrase since the beginning of the year from people in my world.  I can't even tell you how often I have felt this way myself.   

October of last year my husband and I welcomed our 3rd baby girl into our family.  Life with 3 kids was surprisingly easy and I could not have felt happier.  We returned home from a wonderful Christmas and New Years with the family ready to start the new year but something was different.  The air felt heavy, the joy was gone. I looked at my husband and said "I feel like I'm drowning".

One thing after another came at us over the next month and piled on like a weight.  The devil seemed relentless in his pursuit to steal my joy, kill my dreams and destroy my future.  One morning at 4am while nursing my daughter (for the 4th time that night!) I realized the devil was trying to take me out.  I could physically feel him coming at me like a wave, determined to drown me in thoughts of doubt, shame and self harm.  Knowing that you can't fight thoughts with thoughts, and truly being able to handle no more, I stood up, baby girl still nursing in my arms and began out loud to take back my ground.  I told the devil he could not have my family.  I told him I was choosing joy.  I rebuked him in the Name of Jesus and told him I would allow no more.  It wasn't a complicated confession or prayer.  I was honest and firm trusting if I did my part to speak in faith, God would do his part to deliver me.  I laid my daughter down to sleep and after pleading the blood of Jesus over my family I went to bed myself.

When I woke the next morning I knew something was different.  I was operating in the realm of the supernatural though my day to day tasks had never changed.  This time when the devil came at me with his lies and deceitful thoughts it was not a wave I felt but it was as if he was pecking at a glass wall that surrounded me, trying to get in.  He could not reach me.  There was no crack; no way through the glass.  I was covered in the blood of Jesus. I had won.

"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us." - Ephesians 3:20

This verse tells us that God is able to do superabundantly more than we could ever ask or think according to His power that works within us.  His power works in us.  We have the ability to stand up, right where we are, in whatever we're doing (in my case nursing) and wield the power of God.  We have the power to move the mountains that stand in our way; to take our victories.  God is willing and waiting to do His part if only we would have the courage to stand and speak.

TARA HUTZAL

TARA HUTZAL

 

LOST ON PURPOSE

Purpose.

Just thinking of the word makes me think deep – like REAL deep. It is definitely a weighty topic with so much meat, and as much as we may try to avoid thinking about it, we do – or have, at some point. At least that’s the impression I get from the many conversations I’ve had with people. It’s interesting how everybody has different thoughts and opinions on their own personal purpose, but the one thing that everyone seems to agree on is that purpose gives life more meaning, and meaning gives life direction. 

Have you ever met anyone that seemed lost in life? Like they just didn’t know where they were going or why they were doing what they were doing? I think it might be because they don’t know, or see, their purpose. It’s as if their lack of drive to do anything meaningful is due to their lack of direction, making their life choices seem... scrambled and in disarray. It’s kind of a sad thing to see, isn’t it? Because when you see someone who does know where they’re going, I think you’ll agree that person’s entire persona gives off such a positive vibe, is full of life, and you can see a spark in their eyes. 

To be honest, I’m not sure I know what my purpose is yet. And to be REALLY honest, I’ve struggled with it since having a child because I’ve felt like being a mom might be my ONLY purpose now. For someone who’s always kept busy with projects, meetings, and planning, being forced to slow down and divert most of my time, energy, and attention to a child really took a toll on me. It still does from time to time, but something I’m realizing is that our purpose can look a little different in different seasons, and each season serves as part of our life’s purpose.  What is undeniable, though, is that whatever season we’re in, it’s a million times better with people. In fact, there is something about being connected to people that makes life more rich and satisfying, isn’t there? Relationships can steer our direction and give our purpose even more meaning. 

Personally, I think everyone is seeking these two things: purpose and relationship – which is so spot on to what Jesus says in John 10:10. He says, “The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.” People are longing for a life of fulfillment and Jesus came to provide just that – say what?! That sounds like someone with an intention to build a good, life-long relationship to me!

What a relief to know that we’re meant to have a full life and that we’re supposed to enjoy it to the fullest. We don’t have to take life so seriously! Friend, we don’t have to be lost in this world. Having purpose might sound like a weight to carry, yet it’s an enjoyable privilege to find purpose in every season, and to know that we’re never meant to carry it alone.

MARIEL HONG

MARIEL HONG

 

GOD IS FAITHFUL.

I believe that God loves to be faithful to you when you trust him.  I believe that he loves to show up and show off in your life when you ask Him.

When I was first moving out of my parent’s house I had an unreasonable fear of making it on my own.  I had convinced myself that I wouldn’t find a reasonable place to live, that I’d have a dark and depressing basement suite with hardly any windows and possibly mold. Despite having budgeting skills, I had also imagined that I would run out of money and have to move back in with my parents.  Needless to say, I had convinced myself that I couldn’t do it, and this fear probably kept me at home longer than I would have liked to be.

At this time, I was also a new Christian, and my generous new small group hosts bought me a registration to a bible class.  I knew nothing, and the information I was taking in seemed hard to believe.  But, my parents were moving to another town and I needed a place to live, so I latched on to the first two basic scriptures I learned in that class and prayed a tentative prayer.

“You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.”  John 14:14 NIV

 “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than al we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever! Amen.”  Ephesians 3:20 NIV

That was all I had to go on.  I can’t even remember if I felt like God was really there, but I hoped He was, and I asked Him to do what the bible said he would.  I told Him the things I wanted in a new place to live, and I asked in Jesus name that it would be provided and on budget.  I also told Him that I had learned that He could do above and beyond all that I could imagine or think, and that, I expected him to do so.

Soon, an old high school friend moved back to town, reconnected with me and said she was looking for a roommate.  Through a generous family friend of hers, we moved into a large townhouse filled with natural light, for way under the budget I had set for myself when I had expected basement suite living.  Talk about going above and beyond what I could imagine or think.

To this day I feel like God showed up to prove to me that He’s there, and that he cares about the things I care about.  When doubt creeps in, in any situation, I remember how he showed up and wowed me before.

ALISON BOLANOSAlison works on staff at Relate Church and is a vital part of the church community along side her husband Rember.

ALISON BOLANOS

Alison works on staff at Relate Church and is a vital part of the church community along side her husband Rember.

 

21 DAY FAST || MAKE A DIFFERENCE

Romans 12:10-13 (ESV)

Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.  Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality.

My mother always taught me to always put others before myself and love fiercely. It’s something I’ve always tried to live my life by and something that hasn’t always come easy. There’s a necessary balance that one must have when choosing to put another before ones self and that’s something I’m still trying to figure out. There are so many moments that I look back upon and wish that I could have changed my actions and shown people how much they are loved, but as I look to the future I see so much opportunity to allow those moments to happen.

We can look to Jesus as the perfect example of how we can demonstrate this fierce love. He loved thieves, prostitutes, tax collectors, the poor, children and followers equally. He loved the worst and the best of the world and this love continues on even thousands of years later. 


How many times have you come across someone who has done something that just rubs you the wrong way and immediately decide to distance yourself from them? Sometimes it’s easier to look the other way when they walk by because you know what they may have done bothers you. But when we choose to show family love, the kind of love that recognizes and accepts the weakness of others and love them anyways, we then start to learn how to show the type of love that God shows to us.

Loving others isn’t always easy, but a Christ like love means forgiving, accepting and honouring those around us. 

As we finish this 21 Day Fast, I encourage you to look around. Look at the people in your life and ask, how am I making a difference in their lives? Am I honouring my people in such a way that shows the unconditional love that our Saviour shows to us? It’s not always an easy thing to put ourselves aside  and make someone else the priority, but when we step out and choose to show the example of God’s fierce love, that’s where lives can be changed.  

ALANNA HIGGSCommunications Director

ALANNA HIGGS

Communications Director

 

 

21 DAY FAST || OWN IT

A time of prayer and fasting … this may surprise you, but this is my “happy place”! 

Really, no joke. I am being really real with you. You see, I have learned a secret. Spending time in the presence of the Lord is glorious, it is like discovering an oasis in the desert, having enough fresh water to drink until you are fully satisfied. I have developed a real thirst for His living water, now nothing else will satisfy. 

It wasn’t always this way, so if you have found this time difficult, I would happily share a few thoughts with you. Although I had grown up in a traditional church; I came into a real living relationship with Jesus as an adult. I felt like I had soooo much to learn, and I had never, ever prayed out loud for anything other than our nightly meal. For me I approached prayer like a discipline to be learned: right words, right time of day, right heart attitude – whew! It felt so complicated. 

One thing I was determined about, my wonderful husband, Rich and I had both been born again, baptized in water, and then baptized in the Holy Spirit together, and we wanted a real living powerful relationship with Jesus to be our greatest gift of an inheritance for our children, grandchildren, and for the many generations to follow. 

Prov 13:22 NIRV

A good person (a follower of Jesus Christ) leaves what they OWN to their children and grandchildren.

I realized that I needed to “own” this, or as some might say – “possess the land” before I could consider passing it along. My hunger was real, and the Lord provided us with people and resources that encouraged us and modeled what a life of prayer looked like. We saw the fruit in their lives and we were inspired. 

In a seemingly short time, what had started as a duty of praying for needs, became a time of delight as I met with my Saviour and King! I was now ready to share this beautiful relationship with our children; once again the Lord through His Word provided my instruction. 

Deut 6:7 NIRV

Make sure your children learn them. Talk about them when you are at home. Talk about them when you walk along the road. Speak about them when you go to bed. And speak about them when you get up.

Instead of retreating in seclusion, and making prayer something that was hidden, Rich and I chose to speak of the Lord, instruct our children, and pray for and with our children throughout our days, yes, from morning to night. Along with the children’s fridge art, we posted reminders of the Lord’s faithfulness as our family united in prayer for the specific needs of family members and friends, as well as prayers of blessings as our children grew strong and mighty in the Lord. Prayer was not a special event, it was simply part of our everyday life, and we would often just transition from discussing a difficulty into praying for that need. 

We let our relationship with the Lord become as natural as breathing in our home. We woke early in the morning, even before our children arose, so that we could read our Bibles and pray. Often. 

One of our young children would toddle out, and instead of sending them back to bed, we would welcome them, wrap them in a blanket beside us, and let them drift off to sleep; they snuggled beside us as we read our Bibles and prayed – ahhh bliss! 

The Lord’s promises are so rich: 

Numbers 6:24-26 TLB

Start children off on the right path. 

And even when they are old, they will not turn away from it. Prov 22:6 NIRV

I love that this is the Lord’s promise! 

We are responsible to be obedient to the Lord’s instruction found in His Word. 

The Lord is responsible for the results, and He alone will receive all the glory! 

I would like to close by praying a generational blessing over you: 

May the Lord bless and protect you; 

May the Lord’s face radiate with joy because of you; 

May He be gracious to you, show you His favor, 

And give you His peace. 

 

Written by:

Carol Mills

21 DAY FAST || THE ADVOCATE

Psalm 82:3 The Voice (VOICE)

3 “Stand up for the poor and the orphan;

    advocate for the rights of the afflicted and those in need.

Anyone who has spent a little time with me would know that I have a passion for the nations.  I find it fascinating to learn about other cultures and to glean wisdom from how they do life. In my journey’s, I have seen firsthand the plight of the poor and orphans.  One of my dearest friends has a ministry in Ethiopia that provides support for orphaned children.  While the practical help of food, clothing, schooling and medical aid is crucial to their physical survival, of just as much importance is the need for a place to belong.  Community.  Family.  It’s a need that we ALL have in our lives. 

I encourage us all to begin to open our eyes within our own communities and realize that that there are people who feel abandoned, orphaned through the trauma of their own experiences.  All around us, in every demographic, we find those who are vulnerable, oppressed or exploited and in need of advocates to stand up on their behalf. The word advocate is powerful.  One definition says an advocate is a person who pleads for or on behalf of another; an intercessor.

Thank God who understands and knows the need for an Advocate in our own lives. As Jesus is now seated at the right-hand of the Father, He did not abandon us but said He would give us the Holy Spirit to be our Advocate.  How reassuring to know that regardless of what I face, no matter how overwhelming life can sometimes seem, I have an advocate to help guide me through life. 

Jesus has commissioned us to be like Him & to follow His example.  When we allow God’s love to truly lead us with compassion, we will find that we lead with our heart.  This takes a willingness to sacrifice of self as we typically want to justify all the reasons why we can’t reach out to advocate for those in need.  For example, lack of time, lack of expertise or lack of finances.  Compassion will compel us to reach within in order to reach out.  When we do, I believe we will begin to see and hear what he does.  We will do as He has so graciously done in each of our lives. We will be compelled to pass it on. The old adage, ‘People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care’ often opens the door of opportunity to invite hurting humanity to experience the love of Christ….leading them to an opportunity to belong to God’s family.

HELEN BALZER

HELEN BALZER

 

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